


I Want To Touch You (Till We’re Burning)

by brokenhighways



Series: Till We're Burning [1]
Category: CW Network RPF, Supernatural RPF
Genre: Crack, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-13
Updated: 2012-04-13
Packaged: 2017-11-03 14:55:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/382578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brokenhighways/pseuds/brokenhighways
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jared and Jensen have roommates for about a year; both are known for their string of hook-ups, which occasionally annoys their friends. But everything goes downhill when, Jensen, after minor dispute with Jared, starts to take a better look at the younger man. Only to find that that some stupid bitch in Jared's class has added him on Facebook. Looks as though it might be time for Jensen Ackles to stake his claim...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Part One.**   
  


It all starts with Mike dancing to some god awful bubble-gum pop trash. Jensen lucked out in the roommate department and often has to put up with Mike's irritating, impromptu dance sessions. "At least you're not naked this time" he says loudly as he tosses his backpack onto his bed and flops down onto it, "Turn that shit off". Mike doesn't though and Jensen sighs as he grabs a sweater and then heads back out of the room.

There are four of them sharing a small two bedroom apartment just off campus. It's only 2pm, Jensen has a few hours to kill before his shift at the library and he'd like to kill them in peace, preferably on a bed. So he stumbles into the room across the hall from his and Mikes and flops down onto the bed closest to the door. Or well, he attempts to.  In reality he flops down onto something hard that knocks the wind out of his chest and yelps. He opens one eye slowly and finds himself lying on top of Jared Padalecki, who stays in this room with his room mate (or hindrance as Jensen likes to call him) Chad. Jared who usually has class at this time, not that Jensen has his schedule memorised or anything.  
  
"Dude, can't breathe," Jared says from underneath him and Jensen blushes as he quickly extracts himself.  Jared sits up and brushes his hands down his shirt. It's plaid, as usual and Jensen barely refrains from shaking his head at the boy's lack of fashion sense. If it was anyone else he probably would but not Jared. It’s mostly because they have a history that they've never really spoken about. They had hooked up one time before Jensen had known that Jared was a freshman and way before they'd moved into this place.  
  
It'd been a messy, drunken encounter made even more complicated by the fact that Jensen could still remember that night vividly. And so maybe that freaked him out a little bit, but no one could blame him for keeping Jared at arm’s length. It'd been awkward at first but Jared had stopped trying to be his friend round about the time Jensen's friends got around to telling him all about his drunken exploits. Not that Jared could even use that against him, Jensen had heard some choice things about him too. Hell he'd even seen Jared in action. So yeah, they didn't really interact with each other much, so Jensen falling on top of him was a big deal. Jared apparently was not fazed at all,

"Dude, if you wanted to sleep with me all you had to do was ask me." He's teasing obviously but something hot flares up inside in Jensen and he can't help snapping,  
  
"Too bad I don't do repeats." He regrets it right away but can't help feeling a strange sense of vindication when Jared's face falls.

 

"Chad's bed is over there," is all Jared says as he motions to the other side of the room and Jensen pulls a face.

 _I guess I deserved that_ , he thinks as he makes his way over and lies down gingerly. After all he doesn't know where Chad has been.

He’s certain that he  _never_ wants to find out.

~*~

It’s dark when he wakes up, and his first thought is that he’s almost definitely missed his shift. His second thought is derailed by the fact that Mike is sitting in a chair watching him. Just sitting there, watching him in the dark.

“I think you just won the award for being the Creepiest Creeper of the year,” he says blearily as he sits up and rubs at his eyes. His contacts feel dry and itchy and he frowns.  
  
“Bitch, bitch, bitch, Jenny,” Mike says in a sing-song voice and Jensen glares at him.

“Don’t call me that,” he grumbles. “And why didn’t you wake me up?”

“We tried! In the end Jared offered to swap shifts with you.”

“Jared works at the library?”

“Yeah…”

“Oh.” There’s a long silence as Mikes looks at him curiously.  The silence is broken by the door opening loudly and the two of them look up as Jared enters the room and glares when he sees that Jensen is lying on his bed again.

Oops.

~*~

He’s back in his room later on, idly surfing the net when he gets an email from Facebook. The psycho chick from that one frat party he went to is sending him yet another friend request despite the fact that he’s rejected her last fifteen requests. He’s just about to log off when he spots Jared’s latest status update.

Jensen’s not really on Facebook much so he scans Jared’s page quickly, laughs at some of his goofy pictures and the random things that he’s liked. But his smile evaporates when he sees that some girl called Alexis has already “Liked” the status Jared posted 36 minutes ago. It’s just a simple “Tired…” the kind of status that Jensen would usually ignore because it’s not exactly insightful or inspiring. Yet this Alexis chick has liked it and she and Jared have already traded a few comments that border on flirting. Jensen’s seething quietly when he sees that Jared had agreed to message her his phone number. Of course if Jensen was a reasonable person, this is the point where he’d shut down his computer and get some sleep so he can wake up on time for his 9am class. But he’s practically the poster boy of unreasonableness so he spends the next two hours going through her entire Facebook profile, nose scrunching up as he side eyes her drunken pictures with her smudged eyeliner and her “insightful” status updates. He snorts when he sees that  _Kesha_  is listed in her favourite music list along with  _Gossip Girl_ and  _90210_ in the TV section.

And the stalking doesn’t even end there; he somehow stumbles across her Twitter account and grows more and more unimpressed with this Alexis or “Lexi” as she likes to be called chick. Who the hell writes their tweets in  _text speak_  for Pete’s sake? Even so one thing has been apparent the whole time that Jensen’s been online. She’s not good enough for Jared. So, it’s only right that he does everything in his power to prevent Jared from any future heartbreak, right?

~*~

His not-so-genius-plan starts with him getting information from Chad. Chad’s basically the most annoying housemate and Jensen spends 99.9% of the time pretending that he doesn’t exist, but in this instance he’s willing to tolerate him. Even if Chad insists on making him suffer through a very poor attempt to beat Jared’s high score on Guitar Hero.

“So who’s Alexis?” Jensen says all casual like as he pretends to be doing something on the phone.

“This hot chick who transferred out here a week ago, I mean if Jared wasn’t interested I’d totally hit that,” Chad says and Jensen tries hard to hide the look of disgust on his face. Sure he himself is known for getting around but he doesn’t go around bragging about it. Whereas he’s pretty sure that he can picture at least 70% of Chad’s sexual encounters due to vivid descriptions.  “Jared hasn’t been interested in anyone for a while though, and dude, I hope this works out because he wasn’t really performing well in his wingman duties.”

“Huh?” Jensen says because it’s always been  obvious to him that half of what Chad says only ever makes sense  _to_ Chad.  “I thought that Jared liked to play the field a little, I always see him with someone different when we’re out.” Chad turns away from the TV long enough long enough to give Jensen a “are you for real” kind of look and Jensen blinks.

“Have you  _ever_  had a conversation with Jared since we all moved in here? He’s all honourable and shit, I mean I think back in the day he was probably influenced by me but now he’s all about getting to know people instead of getting laid.”

“And why is that?” Jensen asks with his brow furrowed in curiosity.

“I don’t know, he hooked up with this guy around two years ago and gave the dude his number, thought that they had something but the guy never called. Jared was really cut up about it so he must have liked the guy,” Chad pauses as he eyes Jensen carefully. “He swore that he’d never put someone else in that position again."

“Did he, uh, did he mention who the guy was?”

“I wouldn’t tell you even if he had,” Chad answers instantly. “And if you tell Jared that I told you any of this, I’m giving psycho girl your cell number.” Jensen nods in understanding before he frowns and quirks an eyebrow at Chad,

“How do you even know about psycho girl?”

“Dude,  _everybody_  knows about psycho girl.”

~*~

Jensen still has Jared’s number in contacts from back then but he’s never ever contemplated calling it. Not until now at least and he wonders if his sudden fixation on Jared is even normal. It’s not like he wants to date the guy or anything, he just needs to somehow, make up for ignoring him for the last two years, prevent him from getting into anything with Alexis and maybe take him out for a drink. In a purely platonic way of course. But all of that is easier said than done and when he catches sight of Jared and Alexis in the local coffee shop all rationalism flies out of the window. He orders a double shot espresso at the counter and directs the barista to table 7 and then goes over to them and plops down on a chair. Jared who’d been midway through a loud burst of laughter instantly freezes and looks over at Jensen, eyes wide in surprise.

“Hey,” Jensen says easily trying not to make it obvious that his heart is beating rapidly in his chest. Obviously he’s just flushed or something and he was walking pretty fast before he got here because there’s no other valid explanation. Yet he can’t help noticing how the angle of the light makes Jared’s hair look really silky and soft, he can’t help noticing that Jared has really nice eyes and he definitely can’t help noticing the way his treacherous body reacts. He regrets not ordering a cold drink as the barista places his coffee in front of him. He’s about to say something when he catches the dark look Alexis is giving him and he conceals a smirk as he reaches down and pulls off his sweater, revealing his tight, black t-shirt. Jared’s eyes still haven’t left him and he can’t help flexing his arms a little as corny as the whole scene is turning out to be. Alexis’ eyes narrow further and Jared’s blushes and Jensen smiles to himself.

“Do you mind?” Alexis snaps eventually. “We were in the middle of something!” Jensen turns to her with a mock apologetic look and places a hand on his chest.

“I’m  _really_  sorry,” he turns to Jared and for some reason  _winks_  and says, “I just wanted to say thanks for taking my shift and letting me sleep on your bed.” Jensen tries not to burst out laughing as Alexis’ eyes almost pop out of her head. Jared doesn’t notice though, he’s too busy frowning at Jensen,

“Uh, sure no problem.”

“I’m going to a friend’s gig tonight, why don’t you come along and I’ll buy you a drink as a way of saying thanks properly, and we can discuss which shift of yours I can take.”

“Oh, no – you, y—It’s fine, man. Don’t worry about it.” Jared’s flustered and obviously nervous and some part of Jensen can’t help finding it adorable. Especially as he knows that Jared’s not even the nervous type.

“We’ll discuss tonight, I’ll wait for you at home – enjoy your date,” Jensen says as he grabs his coffee and sweater and stands up from his seat.

“Oh, no it’s not a date!” Jared says just as Alexis lets out a curt, “We will.”

Jensen simply smirks as he saunters out of the coffee shop.

~*~

He can’t help feeling disappointed when Jared shows up at the bar with Alexis in tow. Jensen’s friend had asked for help setting up so he’d just texted Jared the name of the bar and left earlier. With Jared’s insistence before that he and Alexis hadn’t been on a date Jensen just knew that she’d invited herself along. She waves at him when she catches sight of him and even though she’s probably too far away to see his face, he glares at her. The band starts playing soon and Jensen gets lost in cheering them on. Two hours have passed by since he last saw Jared and he’s walking towards the front to get a top-up when he spies Jared making out with someone that definitely  _isn’t_  Alexis. Jensen’s not sure how long he stands there staring at the scene in front of him. Eventually Jared and random guy come up for air and before Jensen knows what’s happening they’re leaving the bar together.

_Fucking Chad._

~*~

Jensen finds himself playing Guitar Hero with Chad once again but this time he masks of all of his annoyance and compliments Chad on his pathetic attempts.

“So,” he says as Chad concentrates on hitting the right buttons on the controller, “I thought you said Jared was honourable and that he didn’t do one night stands”

“As far as I know, he doesn’t,” Chad responds and Jensen sighs. “Why are you asking?”

“I don’t think it’s fair of them to lead on that girl Alexis,” he lies. “He went home with some guy from the bar yesterday."

“Oh,” Chad murmurs as he taps the buttons in time to the song blaring out from the television.

“You made up the whole honourable thing didn't you?”

“Not really,” Chad says with a snort, “Jared’s been spinning that line for a while now; maybe he’s trying to pretend that he’s not as big as a slut as you are.” Jensen throws a cushion at Chad’s head and he feels satisfied as Chad loses his grip on the controller.

“Huh,” Jensen says. “Guess that guy did a number on him”.

“Wouldn't it be funny if you and Jared got together?” Chad says as if it really would be the funniest thing, “That way neither of you would have to sleep with anything that moves."

Jensen just throws another cushion, aiming for Chad’s head once again.

~*~

Now that he knows that Jared still sleeps around, Jensen feels as though he should forget about the whole Alexis thing and just focus on getting laid so he can get whatever this whole phase is. But when it comes around to it he just can’t seem to commit to it. He makes out with nothing less than a dozen guys within the space of a week but ends up alone each day. He finds himself wondering what it’d be like to have that one person you could always go home to instead of having to find someone new each time. Jensen wonders if it’s time for him to grow up and actually start acting like an adult for once.  After all, this is his last year of college. This time next year he’ll hopefully have a steady job and his own apartment. Maybe this is the time he needs to take to change. Or maybe he just wants Jared. Who happens to be at the bar right now; with Alexis.

Jensen waits until she disappears through the exit before he slides up to Jared and hopes onto the stool that Alexis was just on. He’s not drunk, just a little tipsy but still that doesn’t matter much when the first thing he says is,

“What’s with the act?” Jared pauses midway through his sip of beer and glances over at Jensen with a confused look. “The whole, adorable, innocent thing when really you’ll just jump into bed with anyone”. Jared splutters then, coughing as his beer obviously goes down the wrong tube and Jensen waits patiently for him to answer.

“Are you drunk?” Jared asks as he eyes Jensen suspiciously, “Because that’s really none of your business, especially when all you do is jump into bed with anyone”. Jensen just smiles because now he knows that he’s touched a nerve.

“What about Alexis?” he asks. “You’re just going to keep stringing her along." A guilty look flashes on Jared’s face and Jensen kicks his smile up a notch and he’s full on grinning.

“Oh yeah,” he continues. “I saw you that night, sneaking out with that guy.” Jared shrugs nonchalantly as his face transforms into a mask of indifference.

“Alexis and I weren't an item then and we’re not one  _yet._ ”

“If you had any sense you wouldn't be an item at all,” Jensen says and Jared snorts.

“Why don’t you worry about your own reputation Jensen, instead of interfering with a situation that has nothing to do with you.” They’ve managed to edge closer together somehow and Jensen can feel how flushed his skin is and how his heartbeat has risen. And let’s just say that certain parts of him are most definitely anticipating something happening here.

“What reputation?” he asks and Jared snorts again.

“I don’t think you need me to answer that,” he says and something deflates inside of Jensen but he does his best to not let it show on his face. He can have his existential crisis later on; right now he gives it twenty minutes before he proves that he’s right.

“Whatever,” he says as he waves his hand dismissively. “She’s bad news dude, but by all means pretend that she’s the one who’s going to turn you into Mr Monogamous." Jensen doesn’t really know what comes over him but he leans over and palms Jared’s crotch, flirtatious smile on his face as he raises an eyebrow. Jared stifles a gasp as his eyes darken and Jensen removes his hand before standing up.

“I’ll be in the john,” he says as he downs the rest of Jared’s beer in one go.

Five minutes later he hears the door slam and the lock click and he turns around to see Jared standing by the door. Jared waits until Jensen’s up and close in his personal space before he whispers,

“I thought you didn’t do repeats.”

“Shut up,” Jensen says as he slams Jared against the door and attacks his mouth. They fuck right there by the door right after Jensen gives Jared the best blowjob he’s ever had.

~*~

Jared’s in still inside Jensen’s bed when he wakes up and Jensen immediately knows that he’s awake. He wants to make a remark about how he doesn’t appreciate being the ‘little spoon’. But he doesn’t say anything, just lies there and tries to ignore the way he really likes the way Jared’s arms feel around him.

“Want me to leave?” Jared murmurs sleepily and Jensen shakes his head. There’s a long silence after, it’s not weird or awkward but strangely comforting. When they both break the silence at the same time, they laugh and Jared urges Jensen to go first.

“I’m sorry for being a dick to you for the last two years. You’re the first hook-up I've had the pleasure of seeing almost every day so you know, it was a little weird."

“Forget about it,” Jared mumbles. “We’re both older and wiser now aren't we?” Jensen snorts as his eyes become heavy and he starts to doze off.

The next time he wakes up Jared’s gone and his spot on the bed is cold.

~*~

Jensen doesn’t know what he was expecting when he eventually got up, but it wasn’t finding Jared and Alexis making out on the couch. He can tell that they’re using tongues and he shudders in disgust as he walks past them and makes his way into the kitchen. He’s surprised to see Mike sitting there with an odd look on his face.

“Didn’t you and…?” Mike says and Jensen doesn’t even pretend that Mike isn’t talking about him and Jared. He nods gently as he refills the coffee maker and starts it up. “And he’s already…” Jensen nods again as he sits down across from Mike.

“And I thought  _you_  were bad!” Mike declares as he shakes his head. When he catches sight of Jensen’s glare he raises a hand and says, “No offence, bro”. Jensen just sighs as he stands up to get his coffee. Of course Jared picks that moment to stroll into the room.

“Any chance there’s some of that coffee for me? Lexi’s driving me crazy today, not that I’m complaining,” he smiles and Jensen rolls his eyes and walks out. Alexis smiles at him sweetly as he walks past her and Jensen just scowls at her.

He heads over to his room and locks the door _. Fuck Jared and his fucking games_. So it’s not like they’d talked and decided to you know, have a  _relationship_  but Jensen couldn’t deny the stab of jealousy that had been seething inside his chest from the moment he’d seen Jared and Alexis together up until…now. He just…he wasn’t sure what he wanted. Usually he’d be out there now looking for someone else to fuck but he simply didn’t want to.

With a sigh, he pulled up his laptop and tried to make some headway with his paper. But he was preoccupied with thoughts of Jared and how he wanted Alexis gone so he could be in her place. He should be the one that Jared was making out on the couch with, the one that made Jared beg and—seriously. Jensen sighs as he opens up Facebook. He rejects psycho girl’s friend request and scans through some brainless updates until he sees that Alexis uploaded a picture of her and Jared three minutes ago. Curiously he clicks on her page and is inundated with tens of pictures of her and Jared or Jared on his own and it’s a little creepy. Even so he can’t help wanting to bait her into some sort of stakes war over Jared because he’s done listening to his conflicting thoughts and feelings. If an impulse led to him having mind-blowingly hot sex then they can’t be all bad.

So he leaves a comment on Jared’s wall that says, “ _Hey, last night was fun. We should do it again sometime”_  and all but cackles with glee as he sends it. He sits there for about five minutes waiting for a notification but instead he hears raised voices and glass smashing. He rushes to the door and unlocks it, stumbling out into the hallway and walking straight into Jared who’s holding a dustpan in his hand and has a shocked look on his face. Jensen’s hit by a surge of guilt when he sees Alexis storming out, eyes glued to her phone. He and Jared both jump as he slams the front door behind her.

“Thanks for that,” Jared says snidely as he retrieves the brush from where it’d been lying in the hallway and walks back into the front room, with Jensen following closely on his heels.

“What?” Jensen says innocently as he stands in the doorway, definitely not watching Jared’s ass as he squats and starts sweeping up the broken glass. “What did she do, through a glass tumbler at your head?”

“She did as a matter of fact, right after she claimed that you were trying to steal me from her!” Jared sounds pissed now and Jensen thinks a lot about himself that he finds it hot as opposed to feeling some remorse for the drama he just caused.

“Sounds like you need to get a new girlfriend,” Jensen says and Jared turns to glare at him.

“She’s  _not_ my girlfriend!”

Jensen just blinks at him because does Jared realise just how confusing he is? To both him and the obviously emotionally disturbed Alexis. 

“Well, whatever she is, you better get rid; I mean I did warn you,” Jensen frowns as he flops down on the couch. “If she’s not your girlfriend why is she still around?”

“It’s none of your business!” Jared says sharply and Jensen just smirks back at him. He really is curious though because Jared’s actions and words don’t add up at all. Plus now that Jensen’s starting to yearn for something more he’s wondering if it’s even worth it. What if he ends up with some guy like Jared who just strings him along while fucking anything that moves on the side? Not that he thinks Jared’s really like that, there’s something in the younger man’s eyes that Jensen sees. A sort of youthful innocence even though he knows from experience that there’s  _nothing_ innocent about Jared at all. The boy has an extremely talented tongue amongst other things. Yet he can’t help feeling as though he can see that small part of Jared that has no idea what he’s doing.

“Look I need something to tell my parents during Spring Break, my mom will ask if I have a girlfriend or boyfriend depending on whether or not she’s still pretending that I’m not bi and I’ll says yes and this way it won’t be a lie,” Jared’s voice is tight and rushed and Jensen just stares at him. He bites back the urge to tell Jared how sad that really is and shrugs instead,

“It’s your life man; just it’s not fair on Alexis is it? Put yourself in her shoes,” Jensen doesn’t know where all of this insight is coming from and he frowns and goes to grab a beer. Mike’s gone to his classes and Chad is god knows where and Jensen figures that Jared will be leaving soon. Though this apparently isn’t the case and Jared pouts for a full three minutes before Jensen relents and grabs him a beer. They find some old Smallville re-runs on TV and fall into a comfortable silence as they watch.

“I cried at the end when he’s in the costume,” Jared says randomly and Jensen looks at him incredulously and there’s a beat before he bursts into a loud fit of laughter. Initially Jared looks mildly offended but he soon joins in and Jensen just blinks,

“What the hell for?” he asks and Jared shrugs,

“Just the show was ending and he finally had the costume on, it was kind of sentimental.” Jensen can’t help smiling at him softly even if he personally doesn’t understand it. The last season had been long overdue and by that point Jensen had only watched them when he needed some background noise.

“Why do you do it?” Jared blurts out suddenly, looking away when Jensen throws him a questioning look and Jared rolls his eyes before continuing. “You know, sleeping your way through town or campus, whatever”.

“Dude,” Jensen says because if they’re going to have this conversation Jared can at least be nice about it. “I don’t know, had a boyfriend once. It got messy so I decided to veto anything complicated and here I am. What about you?”

“Well I had a one night stand with this guy and here I am.” There’s a long awkward silence as Jensen tries to figure out if Jared means  _him_. Or some other guy. And, that’s not jealous swarming in his stomach at the thought  of it being someone else. Because that would be stupid, why would he want to be the indirect reason why Jared fucks anything that moves and has non-girlfriends? So he doesn’t  say anything, just turns back to Smallville. Jared doesn’t pick up the conversation but he doesn’t leave either and Jensen rues the fact that they’re pressed up so close to each other. He can practically see the tension crackling in the (little) air between them and berates the fact that he’s not locked up in his room working on his paper. Fucking Alexis.

_He’s going to need another beer._


	2. Chapter 2

One minute they’re swigging their beers and laughing at something stupid on the box and the next, they're in a tangled heap on the couch, kissing each other so hard that they're practically wrestling. Somewhere in between Jensen losing his shirt and Jared lavishing his nipples slowly but thoroughly he starts to feel guilty. Jared must notice because he pulls back and looks at Jensen questioningly,

"Got cold feet?" Jared says easily and Jensen hates how he sounds so nonchalant about it.

"You have a non-girlfriend!" Jensen says. "It's just...weird man" Jared snorts and stands up, his muscled, naked chest rippling as he moves; so maybe Jensen is trying hard to get his conscience to shut the fuck up. But he just doesn't want to be that guy who ruins relationships. Or...non-relationships. But all it takes is one flash of Jared's sinful catlike hazel eyes gazing into his and he's captivated. He follows Jared blindly into his and Mike’s room, barely remembering to the lock the door. Half an hour later when's he's spilling his come all over Jared's hand as the younger man fucks into him from behind he hazily concludes that he is so and utterly screwed. Literally. 

~*~

Of course when Jensen wakes up it’s not magically 6am on a brand new day. It’s 8pm and he walks out to rustle up dinner only to see Jared sitting at the table with a meek expression on his face as Chad and Mike glare at him. He blinks warily as he pulls out the chair next to Jared and sits down. Jared turns to him and starts to speak,

“It’s an—“

“Intervention,” Chad interrupts and Jensen sighs. They’d probably been watching  _How I Met Your Mother_ again.

“I’m tired of getting sexiled, man,” Mike says apologetically. “Plus, we don’t want things to get awkward; this place is all I can afford right now”.      

“So we’ll switch rooms,” Jared says like it isn't a big deal and three heads turn to look at him.

“What?” Jensen, Mike and Chad all say at once and Jared just shrugs. Jensen shakes his head because there’s  _no_  way he can share a room with Jared. They’d just end up having….

“How many times, you have a girlfriend!” he says to Jared who’s waiting for his reaction.

“ _Non-girlfriend_!”

“That doesn’t even make sense!”

“It’s on urban dictionary—“ Chad starts to say but Jared interrupts.

“Then why have you been saying it all day!”

“Because you’re a confusing and stupid idiot!”

“God you’re like a married couple,” Chad says, raising his hands up in defence when both Jared and Jensen turn to glare at him. “What? You totally are!”    

“SILENCE!” Mike yells and they all turn to look at him in anticipation. “What? I don’t actually have anything to say.” He looks confused as the three of them give him the stink-eye.

“Look,” Chad says, “No more j-squared sex and no more sexiling Mike, he snores like a fucking pig.”   

“Why can’t Mike just come in and sleep inside his own bed when we’re sleeping or something” Jared asks and Mike turns to him and looks at him as if he’s grown two heads.

“I did that smartass and it took you a whooping ten minutes before you started humping Jensen’s leg!”

“This has to be one of the most awkward conversations I have ever been involved in,” Jensen grumbles as he barely resists the urge to face palm. “But it’s okay, nobody has to switch rooms, there’ll be no sex of any kind happening between me and Jared because we’ve decided to be  _friends._ ”

“ _Friends_?” Jared repeats as he glancing at Jensen, Jensen shoots him a look that hopefully conveys  _just play along, okay?_   “Oh yes. Yeah that’s right. Friends. So there.” Mike and Chad don’t look too convinced but they both nod.

“Glad to hear it,” he says. “And now I need a beer.”

“You two don’t get beer” Mike adds and Jensen sighs. He’s being  _mom’d_ by his roommates; what has his life become?

~*~

Oddly enough he and Jared do actually attempt to have a shot at being friends. They hang out during their shifts at the library and at the apartment. Occasionally Jared meets up with Alexis and Jensen most definitely does not spend the entire time stalking her Facebook profile. But he can’t seem to stop himself from divulging in Alexis’ brand of crazy. He’s not sure why he’s so interested in what the hell she gets up to the same way he’s not sure why he keeps on wondering what Jared’s doing with her when he could be with  _him_. All in all it leaves him a pretty miserable mood whenever Jared isn't around. C had keeps on throwing him pitying looks every time he sees Jensen with a pack of gummy words and they have more Guitar Hero conversations. It’s pretty much a cycle of the same shit over the next few weeks.

“You’re acting like a lovesick puppy,” Mike remarks at one point, laughing when Jensen flips him the bird.

The worst thing is that he’s right.

~*~

Spring break eventually comes around but Jensen doesn't go back home because his parents are on a cruise in Barbados, and he doesn’t really want to drive down and spend three weeks with his bratty sister. The library on campus remains open and he pretty much spends most of his time there either working or studying. He doesn't hear much from Jared besides the odd, sporadic email or text and he tries unsuccessfully to keep the younger man from invading his thoughts. One night when he's camped out on the couch wondering when it was that he stopped going out. Usually, he'd be down at the bar making a move on whoever caught his eye. But for some unknown reason ("liar!", the unhelpful voice inside his head calls) he hasn't felt up to it ever since he and Jared stopped fooling around. Before that even, and it's an alien feeling go him. Yet, he wonders if this is what maturity feels like.

He asks Chad this when he arrives back from California and the younger man bursts into a fit of raucous laughter. He only shuts up when he realises that Jensen is glaring at him.

"You were being serious?" he asks in disbelief before he shrugs, "Sure, maybe you've turned into an old man Ackles!" Jensen sighs because talking to Chad just makes him want to strangle someone (read: Chad).

"You're an idiot," he says with a huff. "I don't even know why I'm talking to you." He's finishing up his turn on Guitar Hero as he says this and almost misses the beginning of Chad's implosion. The blonde man's face is pink and his eyes are narrowed and Jensen's seriously wondering if he ought to call 911 when Chad starts yelling,

"This is the EIGHTH conversation we've had about your big, fat, gay love for Jared! I've sat here for a total of at least five hours listening to you go on and on and you can't even let me win at ONE game? Hell, you even beat me at FIFA 2012! We're American! We don't even know how to play decent soccer!  _Seriously_!". Jensen just blinks and proceeds to slap the back of Chad's head.

"Ow! You fucker! Did I mention that this will be the LAST conversation? From now on I'm playing games with Mike."

"He's even worse than you are!" Jensen responds with a snort. And the he frowns,

"Wait, what?" he looks over at Chad with a mortified expression on his face. "What do you mean by 'big, fat, gay LOVE?!"

"Help me not suck at Guitar Hero, and I'll tell you."

~*~

By the time Jared gets back from San Antonio, Jensen is certain of two things, that he's an idiot and that he's stupidly fallen in love with Jared. The only notice he gets about Jared's arrival is a rather dubious text that says, "i come bearing gifts!!!! :) :)". (This just leads to a prolonged daydream about Jensen making Jared come in another way. What? Jensen's only human). He's thankfully over it by the time Jared bounds through the front door. He surprises Jensen by initiating a hug, throwing his long arms around Jensen's frame and pulling him close. Jensen can't help leaning into it, revelling in the warmth radiating from Jared and seeping into his own skin. Neither of them says anything when the hug goes on for longer than usual.

It's probably not a good thing though, because disaster arrives in the form of Alexis.

The first thing Jensen notices is something gleaming in her hand he steps back quickly as he tries to get a closer look. Jared starts to give him a hurt look before he turns and sees Alexis standing there.

“Oh! Alexis, hi.” it sounds fake and forced even to Jensen and he winces slightly when she simply glowers at Jared.

“You said that there was no one else!” she says, her voice level and calm and Jensen raises an eyebrow, “I knew that you were cheating on me with _him_! I mean, I’ve had to listen to you go on and on about him, even our break-up conversation was about him! ”Her bag which was hanging loosely on her wrist falls down onto the ground but she doesn’t seem to notice.

“I thought we discussed this” Jared replies, “We weren’t actually together, you  _know_  this”

“No! That’s what you said Jared, because I’m pretty sure that we were but even so it’s definitely over now,” she says angrily. “Now I’m even more pissed.” Before Jared can say anything she barges past him and heads in the direction of the bedrooms with Jared hot on her heels. 

“Wait, are those scissors?” he hears Jared say in disbelief and with a sigh he goes over to pick up her bag and fishes out her cell. He flicks through her last dialled calls and calls the person she’s called the most in the past week apart from Jared.

“Hello? Where are you?” the voice – Cara according to the caller ID – says and Jensen clears his throat and says,

“Hi, I’m Jensen—“

“Oh, it’s  _you,_ ” Cara says before her voice takes on a suspicious tone. “Wait, why do you have Lexi’s phone? Did you steal it?” Jensen just blinks, because if she’d actually let him fucking speak, he could have told her why he had the damn phone.

“No, I just—“

“Whatever, where is she?” Cara interrupts again and Jensen can’t help snapping,

“Oh for fuck’s sake, will you shut up for a second. Your friend Lexi is here at my apartment causing all kinds of trouble, she has a pair of scissors on her. I suggest that you come and get her because she’s lucky that I called you and not the cops”

“Looks like your boy’s going to be needing a new wardrobe, I’ll be there as soon as I can,” Cara says with a long suffering sigh. By the time Jensen splutters, “He’s not my boy” the line is dead. He huffs and puts the phone back into the bag and goes to check on Jared. Jared’s standing in the doorway with a wary expression on his face as Alexis snips his plaid shirts into mismatched strips. Jensen wonders how she knew what strength scissors to bring.                 

“What exactly are you aiming to achieve by destroying all of Jared’s clothes?” Jensen remarks snidely, “He’s just going toss them in the trash afterwards, kind of like he d—“

“Jensen,” Jared says in a warning tone and Jensen just shrugs. If Jared didn’t look so upset he’d carry on taunting her because this is pretty much Jared’s fault for leading her on in the first place. But the thinks that Jared’s smart enough to realises that so he shuts up. They watch her for a few minutes in silence as she mutters to herself and carries on with her rampage. Jensen looks at Jared who appears to be frozen on the spot and he just sighs. It’s like he’s the only one with a brain around her.

“Look, I’m going to go over there and grab her,” he says. “You grab the scissors – oh and please try and avoid any bloodshed!” Jared doesn’t respond at first and Jensen elbows him.

“Okay!” the younger man acquiesces eventually. As Jensen strides over towards Alexis he contemplates how much jail time he’d get if he just threw her out of a window. Sadly he doesn’t think the jail time would be worth it. As she’s cutting up a truly horrible, pink shirt Jensen grabs her, lifting her straight up off the ground. She starts screaming like some sort of banshee and Jensen’s already planning out the epic apology they’re going to be giving the neighbours inside his head. She drops the scissors and Jared rushes past and picks them up, placing them on his night stand as Jensen carries Alexis out of the room, through the hallway and straight through the front door. She kicks and screams the entire time and Jensen figures that Jared owes him  _big time_ for this.

Of course, he runs straight into Chad, who takes one look at Alexis and grins,

“Dude, what did I miss?” he asks excitedly and Jensen just ignores him as he reaches the side-walk by their front door. He considers dumping her on the ground but can’t actually bring himself to be that cruel.

“Let me go!” she whines and Jensen sighs.

“Look, I could have called the police but I didn't  is this really how you want to be acting in public?” he tries to keep his tone calm and seething even though he’s really thinking something along the line of ‘ _Girl, you crazy!’_. She seems to calm down then and Jensen starts to loosen his grip. He’s midway through his sigh of relief when the tears start. He puts her down and stands there watching her unhelpfully and before he knows what he’s doing he goes back inside and grabs her bag.

“Come with me.” he says as he hands her bag and he starts to walk in the direction of the nearest coffee shop. She cries silently the whole way there and Jensen just wonders what the hell he’s doing. Jared should be the one calming down his freaking girlfriend not Jensen. Yet he kind of feels obligated because he is partly responsible for everything. He orders a black coffee and bottled water for Alexis when they get there and directs her to a table at the back. He hands her a couple of the serviettes he picked up from the dispenser and she dabs at her eyes carefully. It’s kind of moot because her make-up is pretty messed up already but he doesn’t say anything about it.

“Well this is awkward,” he says for a lack of something to say. “Have you calmed down now?”

“Yeah,” she replies with a nod. “At least this isn't as bad as last time."

“Last time?”

“Yeah, my last boyfriend,” Alexis replies. “I keyed his car and spray painted “DOUCHE” on the rear window.”

Jensen remains silent.

“It was cathartic,” she adds and Jensen just clears his throat uncomfortably. “Look, I know that we’ll never be friends but you have to at least admit that you’ve been pulling some serious ‘I’m jealous’ crap on me”. Jensen is taken aback by her abrupt subject change and it takes about a minute for him to regain his bearings.

“Okay,” he says eventually. “But Jared told me that you guys weren’t actually dating, you came off as being kind of creepy to me so I riled you up a little”.

“And?” she says and Jensen frowns at her? What does she want an apology?

“And what?”

“You’re not going to apologise? I mean, you escalated the situation and not only that, Jared used me so that he could make you jealous!”

“Uh-huh, and  _I’m_ the one who should apologise?” Jensen says. “Sorry, sweetheart, it’s not going to happen and I know that Jared’s already apologised to you repeatedly, meaning that you were way out of line back there.”

“Bu—“Alexis tries to interrupt but Jensen ignores her and continues.

“I’ve seen right through your ‘girl next door’ bullshit since day one, and I was wondering when you’d show your true colours, sure maybe Jared could have handled things better but the way I see it, he ended things sooner rather than later and apparently explained everything to you.”

“Get to the point,” she snaps when Jensen pauses and Jensen snorts,

“You owe Jared an apology, and like 20 new shirts,” There’s a long silence as she watches him, her blue eyes are suspiciously clear despite the waterworks and Jensen fights back the urge to shake his head. If he didn’t think she was completely deranged he’d have to give her some points for trying to make  _him_  feel sorry for her.

“Fine,” she says with a huff. “And for what it’s worth I’m sorry about the way I’ve been acting towards you”.

“Ditto,” Jensen replies because he probably did escalate the situation. “So what did Jared say to you when he ‘broke up’ with you?” He knows that he should wait until gets back home and ask Jared but he wants to hear what Alexis has to say. Plus he’s not sure what happens now that Alexis is out of the picture, is Jared going ask him out? Are they going to be boyfriends? He likes Jared and well, there’s attraction between them, that much is obvious. But after everything Jensen’s not sure if he’d really want to be in a relationship with Jared.

“That he liked someone else, and that I had the wrong idea, he’d led me on and he was sorry for that, blah, blah,” Alexis says as she waves her hand dramatically. “And I asked if it was you he liked, and his whole face lit up and, it made me lose my shit a little because he’d never looked at me like that, but he didn’t notice and he started talking about how awesome you are.”

“Huh,” Jensen says. “That must have stung a little.”

“It kind of made me want to puke,” she replies with a laugh. “He…obviously adores you, sounds like he has done for a while”.

“What makes you think that? Not that I trust your judgement or anything, you’re kind of crazy,” he replies, eyes widening in surprise when she just laughs.

“Hell, maybe I am,” she says. “But all he ever did was talk about you, I guess. Even when I tried to distract him, I guess I just tried to ignore the truth.”

“Yeah, you don’t say”.

~*~

Jensen puts an end to the conversation when he catches Alexis making eyes at the guy sitting at the table next to theirs. The guy’s not bad looking, he has light, brown skin and dark brown eyes and is looking right back. It’s a little unnerving how quickly she seems to have just moved on from Jared and well, he’d rather be away from her as soon as possible. They walk back to the apartment, Jensen stopping every single one of her attempts to start up a conversation with him.

“You know we could be friends, if we put everything behind us,” she suggests at one point and Jensen snorts,

“Keep on dreaming, sweetheart”. She huffs as she taps away at her cell. Jensen wonders how she’s even able to walk in a straight line with her eyes permanently glued to that thing. His cell vibrates in his pocket when they’re about five minutes away and he pulls out to see that it’s a text from Jared saying,  _where r u? I tried calling but u didn’t pick up._  His phone was silent so he didn’t get the miscalls, not that he would have picked it up anyway. He has the urge to talk to  _Chad_ of all people about everything because he doesn’t really know yet what he’s going to do about the Jared situation.

Her friend, Cara is waiting by the door when they arrive and Alexis rushes up to her. Cara looks unimpressed though and Jensen can’t help smirking at the crushed look on Alexis’ face. Cara says a few words to her and Alexis sighs before reaching into her back and pulling out a thin book. Jared opens the door then, worry evident on his face as he glances at Alexis but then he spots Jensen and Jensen watches as his expressive, hazel eyes light up and he starts to head in his direction. Out of the corner of his eye he catches Alexis looking at Jared curiously before she turns to Jensen and gives him a sly thumbs-up.

She really is fucking certifiable.

“Hey!” Jared says once he’s standing right next to Jensen.

“Hey,” Jensen replies. “We’ll talk in a bit”. Jared looks hurt at Jensen’s quick dismissal and Jensen tries to hold back his sigh. It’s another tick in the ‘ _reasons why I’d suck at a relationship’_  list. With random fucks, he doesn’t have to worry about feelings and saying the right thing. It’s easy. But then maybe that’s the point. Relationships aren’t supposed to be easy, and it’s not just going to be perfect. And that’s no reason for him not to try.

“Okay,” Jared replies with an easy shrug. Alexis walks over and he feels Jared tense beside him. He remembers that the last time Jared saw her she was a screaming mess so he reaches out and rests his hand on Jared’s arm gently.

“She’s still crazy,” he says. “But she’s calmed down now, just hear her out”. Jared nods at him, though Jensen can see the trepidation in his eyes. He wonders if wanting to hug Jared is normal; is he supposed to feel like that? Like he wants to shield him from harm. Jensen doesn’t do hugs…but for Jared, he would. He  _wants_  to.

“…sorry for my actions, it was childish and stupid. Especially after you took the time to explain everything to me” Alexis is saying when Jensen snaps out of his thoughts.

“Uh, yeah. I mean it’s okay. I get it,” Jared says. But Alexis shakes her head vigorously.

“No it’s not, and here I want you to take this,” she hands him a slip of paper that looks suspiciously like a check, “For your shirts, maybe we can get together and buy some together. The ones I ruined were kind of ugly”. Jensen bites his cheek to stop himself from laughing at the panicked expression on Jared’s face.

“Yeah. Maybe,” Jared says and Jensen can tell that he wants to hand the check back over and he speaks up,

“Glad everything is sorted out, we’ll see you around.” It’s a little rude of him, judging by the way Jared is looking at him but he’s tired and just wants to go inside already. Alexis just shakes her head at him and beckons Cara over. As they’re walking down the path Jensen frowns suddenly. He’s pretty sure that he knows Cara from somewhere but he dismisses the thought with a shrug and catches up with Jared who’s almost by the door.

“Well, she was right about one thing” he says, “Those shirts were pretty ugly”.

“That didn’t seem to bother you before.”

“Probably because I was too busy ripping it off you”. Chad groans from where’s sitting on the couch with a giant bag of Cheetos. Jensen watches him communicate with Jared silently before he says he turns to him,

“Dude, psycho girl was here!”

“Cara is psycho girl? And you were pretend dating her best friend?” Jensen says as he turns to Jared. “We need to move”.

 


	3. Chapter 3

Things get awkward after that day due to Jensen’s continued indecision over where he and Jared stand. He takes more shifts at the library and throws himself into his studying. Whenever he’s at the apartment he mostly holes up in his room as he eats, sleeps and studies some more. He doesn’t want to make the situation even more awkward than it is and he doesn’t want to lead Jared on either. Every time he decides to just go for it, some other reason for him not to comes up and leaves him feeling more confused than ever. Ideally, he should talk to Jared about it but Jared’s too close to the problem, hell he is the problem. That and the fact that Jensen will have no idea what he’s doing. But then why does it feel as though he’s screwing things up before they’ve even started.

“Ah, here you are. Mrs Mortimer said I’d find you here,” Jared appears suddenly in the aisle where Jensen is restocking Biology textbooks, causing him to jump.

“You scared the crap out of me,” he says as he turns around. Jared’s wearing a short sleeved black-shirt that shows off his tan, muscular arms and the ends of his long, dark, brown hair are peeking out of a snug looking grey beanie. Jensen’s just about to cast his eyes downwards when Jared clears his throat and says,

“So you’ve been avoiding me.” with his puppy dog eyes in full force. Jensen feels a surge of guilt in his chest but Jared continues before he can say anything. “Chad beat me at Guitar Hero, said that you showed him how to beat my score.” Jensen feels his face flush.

_Fucking Chad._

“He told you about our conversations didn’t he?” he asks, his voice low and hesitant.

“He refused to tell me what you said though, said I had to tell you the truth and ask you myself.” Before Jensen can reply there’s a noise and something heavy falls and whacks him on the head. The last thing he sees is Jared’s wide eyes as he tumbles to the ground and everything goes black.

~*~

When he wakes up Jared’s face is hovering above his and Jensen can feel his warm breath fanning over his face. With a groan he pushes Jared back gently and sits up slowly. He blinks a few times and sees that they’re still in the library in the Biology section. There’s also a few people gathered behind Jared and he frowns.

“What happened?” he asks, wincing as his head starts to throb.

“Uh, you were knocked out by…” Jared glances down at the large book next to Jensen on the floor. “An Introduction to Biology 101”

“Jensen, dear,” Mrs Mortimer says from behind Jared, concern evident on his face. “Will you be requiring any medical assistance?”

“What? Uh, no ma’am,” he replies dazedly.

“Let Jared take you home, dear. I’ll find someone to cover your shift,”

~*~

Jared’s been rambling for a full five minutes when Jensen snaps,

“Jared, stop! God, you’re giving me a headache. I just want to take a nap”.

“But you were out for like a minute, should you be sleeping? Are you sure that you don’t want me to take you to the hospital?”

“For the fiftieth time, yes I’m sure!”

“Okay, okay!” Jared concedes with a nervous chuckle. “You didn’t have to get yourself knocked out to get out of a conversation with me,” Jensen knows that it’s meant as a joke but he can hear the underlying seriousness in Jared’s voice.

“Jared…”

“No, man. It’s cool. I’ll leave you to get some rest.” Jensen doesn’t know what prompts him to say what he does but the second it’s out of his mouth he realises that it’s what he wants.

“Stay,” There’s a pause as he waits for Jared to say something. “Just until I fall asleep”.

“Okay,” Jared replies. “Okay”.

The last thing Jensen feels before he succumbs to sleep are Jared’s strong arms wrapping around him.

~*~  
  
He’s woken up by the door creaking open and he sits up, rubbing at his eyes. He reaches over towards his night stand and grabs his glasses and shoves them on. It’s been a while since he’s worn them and it takes a second for his eyes to adjust. Jared’s standing in his doorway and Jensen watches as he swallows visibly before clearing his throat and asking,

“So how are you feeling?”

“Better,” Jensen says with a shrug. “We should finish our talk now, and I’d just like to say that I’m sorry for avoiding you since the whole Alexis thing”.

“I understand,” Jared says. “I’ve liked you for a long time, Jensen. I’m used to waiting”. Jensen beckons Jared over and motions for him to sit down before he gets a crick in his neck from looking up at him awkwardly.

“You shouldn’t have to though, I mean. Is that how relationships work, you wait until the other person is ready? That can’t be healthy or any good,” he replies heart thumping in his chest as he hopes to God that he’s not saying the wrong thing here.

“That’s kind of the whole point; you’re supposed to want enough to wait. Maybe it’s not healthy or whatever but you have to believe that the other person is worth the wait,”

“And what if I’m not, what if I’m not the person you think I am, I’m completely different from you, I’m rude, kind of uptight, and I complain a lot, I’m horrible in the mornings…”

“All of which I’ve known for a long time, and none of that stuff bothers me,” Jared replies easily. “After the first time we hooked up I developed this huge crush on you, of course it kind of hurt a little when you didn’t call me and then Chad told me that there was no chance that would happen. So I pined and moped around a little until Chad got all pissed at me and said that the only way I’d ever stand a chance with you again was if I slept around and by chance bumped into you,”

“And you listened to him?”

“Not at first but then I realised that I had to get over you at some point and hooking up with random people helped a little bit and then…”

“Then you moved in here,” Jensen finishes and Jared nods,

“And it was like being back after than night, sitting around and wondering why you didn’t call, so I carried on hooking up with anyone and whining to Chad about how you wouldn’t even look at me. I thought you hated me or something,”

“I never hated you,” Jensen says. “It was just awkward because out of all of the guys that I’ve been with…you’re the one that I’ve always remembered”. The words are out before he can take them back and he looks down as he blushes deeply.

“Huh,” Jared replies. “Chad said I should try and make you jealous. Said that he saw the way you looked at me when you thought no one else was looking.”

“You know, I kind of hate Chad.” Jared just laughs and rolls his eyes.

“So the whole thing about my parents and Spring Break was…not true.”

“Why didn’t you just, I don’t know, ask me out?” Jensen can’t really get his head around Jared going to such lengths just to have a chance with him.

“Would you have said yes?” There’s silence as Jensen contemplates the question. He can’t actually remember the last time someone’s actually pursued him. Sure he’s hooked up with a lot guys but most of the time they’d for the most part never actually been interested in starting anything with him. It’s never really bothered him before until now because…he’s never really wanted a relationship before.

“If it’d been anyone else but you, then no. But if you’d asked…then, I’d at least have thought about it.”

“Well, what about now?” Jared says, his voice rushed. “Will you go out with me now?”

“Depends,” Jensen replies with a smirk. “Do you promise not to wear any of your ugly shirts when we’re out, well the ones that Alexis didn’t destroy?”

“I’ll take that as a yes,” Jared says softly and Jensen looks up and grins at him.

“It’s definitely a yes,”

~*~

Two days later Jared has the late shift at the library and Mike’s on a date so Jensen ends up playing Guitar Hero with Chad once again. Except this time they’re just hanging out and not talking about Jensen and Jared’s epic love affair. Well for the first fifteen minutes anyway. Chad’s been quiet so far which is unlike him and thus pretty unnerving.

“Come on, out with it!” Jensen says as he pauses the game and drops his controller. Chad’s not even really paying attention as he taps away at his phone furiously.

“Huh?” Chad murmurs without looking up and Jensen sighs in frustration.

“The whole if you hurt him, you’re a dead man speech?” Chad just gives him a confused look that clearly says that he has no idea what Jensen’s talking about.  Moments later recognition dawns on his face and Jensen rolls his eyes.

“OH! Oh. Okay. Well yeah. There will be death if you hurt Jaybird!” Chad says and Jensen just raises an eyebrow.

“Really? That’s the best you got?” he replies. “I’m not feeling intimidated at all by you.”

“I have a secret weapon, you see” Chad says with a chuckle. “Her name is Alexis and she wants to be friends with Jared, she’s also really handy with a pair of scissors.”

“You suck.”

~*~

“I hate surprises,” Jensen says as he holds his phone between his shoulder and ear.

“You’re probably going to hate this one,” Jared replies.

“Okay, then why is it a surprise?”

“Because you’d never have come otherwise.”

“Wait a second, isn’t this the street the theater is on? Isn’t today like fully booked out with people wanting to see Titanic 3D?”

“Uh, I kind of like the movie, why you don’t?”

“No.”

“I kind of figured that you didn’t, which is why I want to watch it with your snarky commentary”.

“You just to see Kate Winslet’s rack in 3D don’t you?"

~*~

Their first date is underwhelming. Mostly because Jared booked tickets to see Titanic 3D with ‘anyone he could bribe to see it with him’ but got himself a boyfriend in time for it not to come to that. By the time the movies over Jensen has a sore ass and a pounding headache and Jared’s constant chattering is more annoying than endearing. Unfortunately for him the surprises aren’t over and he follows Jared aimlessly as the younger man tugs him as he grips his hand tightly. To make things worse, they’re on foot and Jensen seriously doesn’t want to scare Jared away on the first freaking date so he clears his throat and says,

“Hey do you mind if we leave this for another day? Just I have a really bad headache and—“

“Oh, sure. Sure of course,” Jared says far too quickly and Jensen sighs. He’s so planning their next date.

~*~

The second date goes slightly better at first. Jensen picks pizza and bowling, even manages to persuade Jared to come along with him despite the protests that he sucked at the game.

It turns out that he does really suck at bowling.

At first it’s hilarious how bad Jared is, but then Jensen finds himself getting more and more annoyed. He knows he’s making things awkward but the whole game is pointless when the other person can’t even knock down more than three bowling pins with one ball. And then of course Jared trips on a ball that rolls backwards and falls on his ass and ends up limping out of the alley as Jensen shakes his head in despair.

~*~

“This isn’t working,” Jensen says, fingers stilling as he stops strumming his guitar. He’s at his best friends Chris’ house and their jamming together with a few beers and their guitars. He actually hasn’t seen Chris in a couple of months, due to the fact that Chris graduated a year ago.

“What isn’t?” Chris says, “Too much tempo or not enough?”

“Not the song! Me and Jared!”

“Jared, the guy you spent two hours on the phone bitching about when he moved into your place?” Chris says unhelpfully and Jensen glares at him.

“It was not two hours and yes him, we’re….I don’t know, dating I guess”. Chris breaks into a loud fit of laughter that dies down slowly as Jensen glares at him again. “Seriously?”

“Yes!” Jensen says, not understanding why it’s so hard to believe.

“And have you told anyone?” Chris asks and Jensen realises with a start that he actually hasn’t. He’s not been doing much socially as he’s got a ton of studying to do and Mike and Chad pretty much already know so there was no one to tell. Except for his friends.

“No. That’s bad isn’t it?” he says hesitantly as he wonders how many people Jared’s told. He quickly recounts the disastrous dates to Chris whose mouth twitches the whole time like he’s trying hard not to laugh.

“You took him bowling?” the man remarks. “Poor kid”.

“Look, I can’t help taking the game seriously even if no one else does”.

“Look, so both of you screwed on up on your first couple of dates. It’s all about compromise Jensen, you just have to find something where the two of you have some common ground and go with that. And, when you’ve been dating for longer, maybe then you’ll be able to do something that the other person doesn’t like.”

“Maybe I’m not cut out for a relationship,” Jensen mumbles.

“Maybe you should work on not giving up at the first sign of trouble.”

~*~

Their third date goes well. They’re at one of Chris’ gigs and Jared seems to be getting along with his friends. In fact Jensen would go as far as to say that tonight is a roaring success despite the fact that Chad has decided to hit on some random chick in the creepiest manner. Jensen’s not even sure why Jared invited him along, but he catches them having one of their weird silent conversations and lets it go. Eventually their friends clear out from their booth (in an un-subtle manner by the way) and it’s just them for the first time in the evening.

“I like Chris’ band. They’re good,” Jared says with a bright smile that Jensen can’t help returning. “Still freaking out?”

“Freaking out about what?” Jensen says with a frown as he wonders if Chris has been saying anything. Hell, there’s a reason why he didn’t unload that crap onto Chad.

“Our disastrous previous dates!” Jared says as if it’s the most obvious thing and Jensen finds himself shrugging nonchalantly. Jared looks unsure though and Jensen chooses his next words carefully, not wanting to say something that will screw up what’s been an okay third date.

“They weren’t that bad,”

“You yelled at me in a packed bowling arena for sucking at bowling,” Jared says. “I’d say it was pretty bad”. There’s an awkward silence as Jensen goes over what he’d initially planned to say. He thinks about what Chris said about compromise and he realises that they’ve been doing that already. He saw the movie even though he hates it and Jared went bowling with it even though he was awful at it. Looking back at it now, it was stupid for him to just think that things would be simple right away.                                      

“I get a little serious with my bowling sometimes,” Jensen admits. “Looking back on it now, it was kind of funny. You looked ridiculous in the shoes.” He laughs at the mock disgruntled expression Jared throws him.

“Laugh it up cowboy, wish I could have taken a picture of the sour look on your face during Titanic,” Jared says and Jensen lets out a suffering sigh.

“I’m never sitting through that crap again Jared,” he says. “I will withhold sex”. Jared blushes when he says that and there’s an awkward silence. That’s another thing that they haven’t actually spoken about. It’s not like they haven’t slept with each other before but it seems to be off limits by some sort of weird unspoken agreement now that they’re officially dating. The whole thing feels forced somehow. It’s almost as if they’re trying too hard to be something that they’re not. One thing Jensen is certain of is that they’ve never been “just friends”. So in a way that time when they were hanging out with each other and enjoying each other’s company could be classified as dating. It’s not like they hadn’t indulged in some harmless making out even with the elephant (Alexis) in the room.

“This is stupid,” they both say in unison and they both burst into laughter at the same time. Jensen motions for Jared to go first,

“We’re trying too hard to be something we’re not right? We’re not some conventional couple. I mean, we got together after my non-girlfriend destroyed 90% of my awesome shirts!” he says. “Maybe we should just try and be natural. Go back to the stupid movie nights and things like that. Because they were the highlight of my days.”

“And,” Jared continues. “Even when you were ignoring me, I still felt like I knew a part of you somehow, like one day you’d finally see me. And right now it feels as though there’s like stained glass in the way that’s blurring something that was once clear.”

“You’re such a sap,” Jensen chides the younger man teasingly. “But I agree. This isn’t us. We totally kick ‘conventional’ in the ass anyway.”

“Agreed!” Jared replies as he looks around the bar, Jensen’s not sure what he’s looking at though and he doesn’t want to move his gaze away from Jared’s face. It’s kind of scary how much he feels for Jared. It’s not quite love yet but it’s pretty damn close.

“I saw you every day,” he says softly. “Don’t ever doubt that”. Jared looks at him blankly for a few seconds but Jensen see the exact moment that Jared gets it and the younger man grins so brightly that Jensen’s sure that it must hurt a little. Yet the only clear thought running around in his head is;  _I did that. I put that smile on his face._

"So if we're really gonna give this 'dating' thing a go then I guess I should be completely honest with you.  I never hooked up with that guy that you saw me with in the bar.  I bribed him to make out with me by buying him some Johnny Walker Black."

"You son of a bitch, you did  _what_?" Jensen says with a disbelieving laugh and Jared smiles at him sheepishly

"The whole 'thing' with Alexis didn't seem to be pissing you off enough, so I thought that maybe if you saw me with another guy......” he trails off, his voice unsure and quiet. His bows his head down slightly and Jensen realises he has to say something before all the progress they’ve made ends up being pointless.

“You thought that’d  _really_  piss me off?” Jensen finishes and Jared nods. “You’re an idiot”. There’s no malice behind his words though and Jared looks up at him from beneath his bangs and smiles.

“I’m your—“

“Please don’t finish that sentence” Jensen interrupts and Jared just throws back his head and laughs. And even if people look over to see where the  _loud,_ booming laughter is coming from, it’s the best sound Jensen’s ever heard.

~*~

 They’re in bed making out lazily the next morning when a thought occurs to Jensen.

“Did we sexile Mike again?” he asks. Jared gives him a slightly guilty look before he shakes his head and mumbles something inaudible. “What was that?”

“I switched rooms with Mike, so this is officially our room,” Jared says louder this time around and Jensen can hear the apprehension in his voice. The look on Jared’s face tells him that Jared’s waiting or is at least prepared for some sort of freak out but Jensen surprises him by shrugging and kissing him on his nose lightly. And seriously, only God knows why he’s doing all of this sappy shit without being prompted. Jared just has that effect on him.

“That’s awesome,” he says. “Means that I get to do this without any interruptions”. Without waiting for a reply he latches onto Jared’s mouth and kisses him deeply as he reaches down to palm at Jared’s half hard cock. Jared moans into his mouth softly as Jensen starts to jerk him off softly and Jensen feels his own dick stirring and is just about to inch closer when the door swings open.

“Dude, grocery run,” Chad announces as he looks into the room. “And oh my god, I’d better add brain bleach to the list. Thank god that I bought those earplugs yesterday. Ugh.”

“Go away,” Jensen says with a glare as Jared starts giggling beside him.

“No way. Last time I didn’t take you along with me, you bitched about me buying the wrong brand of cereal for like three hours.” Chad says with his eyes on his phone. “By the way, Alexis got my number somehow. I’m sure she’d just love a picture of you guys”. He leaves then and Jensen sits up wondering if Chad was actually being serious.

“Can you get me some—“

“Let me guess, gummy worms and candy that contain a ridiculously high sugar content?” Jensen finishes as he sits up and reaches down for his discarded jeans from the previous night. “Think we can make the trip in less than half an hour?”

“No,” Jared says with a snort.

“Your faith in me is amazing,” Jensen replies as he pulls his shirt over his head. He’s thankful that they cleaned up last night and they’d only been making out otherwise he’d definitely need a shower first. But he supposes that washing his face and brushing his teeth quickly will do.

“I’m amazing!” Jared says sleepily and Jensen can’t help smiling softly. 

“Yeah you kind of are." Jared’s response is a soft snore and Jensen shakes his head fondly. He’s tempted to just lock the door and forget about the groceries so that he can slip back into bed and curl up with Jared because he really doesn’t want to leave. Not just because they’d (probably) just been about to have sex but just for the sake of being with Jared. Hell, he’d even be down for some snuggling and Jensen does not snuggle. But for Jared he’d probably do anything, probably break all of his rules. He knows that it won’t be easy but he loves these little moments where just thinking about Jared makes his chest kind of burst with joy.

Chad yelling his name breaks this particular moment and he curses under his breath. He’s pretty sure that Chad could have asked Mike to go with him but he gets the feeling that Chad is suddenly calling in his favours after all of their Guitar Hero conversations. He lets out a sigh as he shoves his boots on.

_Fucking Chad._

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       

[fin]

NO PLAID SHIRTS WERE HARMED IN THE MAKING OF THIS FIC.

Thank you for reading! 

 


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